Score by Kennedy Ryan | Worth Every Second of That Wait

I’ve had this audiobook on hold in my e-library for quite some time and baby the minute that notification popped up, I started listening.

Let me preface this by saying that Wesleigh Siobhan and Winston James could read the alphabet to me and I’d gladly listen. Emmanuel Ingram is STILL my favorite narrator but I digress lol.

We were already introduced to Monk Bellamy and Verity Hill throughout Reel. Baby, three chapters in I already knew whatever happened between them had Monk SALTY AF without even knowing the details. He was ready to bite Cannon’s head off when he told him he wanted Verity to write the script for Dessi Blue.

Score takes us back in time to find out why.

Monk and Verity met in college at one of his music gigs. Verity’s girlfriend/lover Petra introduced them because she could feel and see from jump that they were feeling each other. They invite Monk to a gathering at Petra’s apartment the next night and he reluctantly agrees. He was very attracted to Verity but didn’t want to step on Petra’s toes, nor was he sure Verity would even be interested in him. That evening he found out Verity was bisexual and Petra invited him to join them in a threesome. Petra doesn’t do men and laid out the ground rules, which included that he couldn’t kiss nor have intercourse with Verity but everything else was fair game. Monk enjoyed every minute with Verity and could not stop thinking about her after that night. Even without penetration or kissing, they shared felt intense, intimate and more real than anything they had ever experienced.

A few weeks later they run into one another, and he discovers that she and Petra broke up shortly after that night. They have dinner, get to know each other better and share their first kiss. That kiss ignites an insatiable passion between the two. Because Verity is used to open relationships, Monk makes it clear he is not willing to share her with anyone else. His parents’ ruined marriage solidified that fidelity is something he won’t compromise on. When they finally have sex it’s as though their souls melded. Monk is a passionate lover, and Verity has never felt like this with any man.

Monk heads home for the holidays to face his family. While his siblings and mother have forgiven his father, the pastor, for his infidelity, Monk refuses to and carries that with him. Monk tells his family about Verity and she does the same. Verity’s aunts, who’ve raised her since her parents died, are insistent that she continue taking her medication, so whatever happened at USC doesn’t happen again.

Once they return from the holiday breaks, they reconnect and continue spending even more time together. At some point Verity starts spiraling. Not being herself, behaving erratically, wearing inappropriate clothing. One night, after rejecting her advances while he was working in the studio, Monk finds Verity at a bar in the men’s restroom nearly naked with another man’s hands all over her. In that moment he is angry and done. He says some pretty hurtful things to her and lets her know they can’t come back from this. Verity has a mental breakdown and after nearly being arrested on campus, she is hospitalized back home in Georgia and doesn’t set foot on campus again.

While hospitalized, she learns that what happened to her at USC and now at Finley is a result of bipolar disorder which she likely inherited from her father. She has to go through a lot of therapy to unpack the night she lost both of her parents and in doing so is able to piece together so much that has happened in her life. She is still so distraught over her breakup with Monk but feels it is probably for the best.

Two years later Verity left Georgia and moved to New York. She continued with therapy, found a support group and resolved to live out her dream of being a screenwriter. On her last night in NY before moving to LA, she is horrified when she comes face to face with Monk. While Monk puts up a good front, inside he has missed her terribly and can’t stop himself from replaying their times together. The conversation between the two was awkward as they both feign indifference. But baby lol Monk is still possessive over her. He was asking her about the man she was with, Louis, and it was almost comical. The way he tells her to have a nice life and walks away waiting for her to stop him? Sir.

They both know what they had was real but his hurt and her refusal to let him know what was happening to her during that time won’t allow reconciliation.

Fast forward to present day. Cannon Holt has reached out to Verity about writing the screenplay for Dessi Blue, only for her to find out that Monk is doing the score. They would have to work closely together through the duration of production. Verity refuses to let Monk know her diagnosis but does share it with Cannon. She doesn’t want there to be any issues that could affect this opportunity of a lifetime.

It’s been 10 years since they last saw one another and the sexual tension is still on a thousand. While they both pretend it doesn’t exist, everyone around them feels it. From the moment they kiss again they cannot keep their hands off one another. Against his better judgment, Monk approaches Verity and says he’s willing to have a strictly sexual open relationship with her for the duration of production. Verity only wants to be with him, but he refuses to be hurt by her again. She reluctantly agrees to the arrangement, wanting nothing more than to have him in any way she can. I don’t even know why he THOUGHT that was a good idea. Any time Monk even sees Verity talking to another man he loses his mind. Never mind the jealousy that consumes Verity when women flirt with Monk. They both need Jesus!

The first night they reconnect sexually, it’s obvious that Monk isn’t going to hold up his end of the “sex only” bargain. He wants her to be his but refuses to tell her that for fear of being hurt again. But he also refuses to allow her to get close to any other man.

Monk still doesn’t know about Verity’s diagnosis and her efforts to push him away again nearly destroy them. When she does finally reveal it, their relationship seems to take a turn for the worse. Monk loves her and wants nothing more than to protect her, especially knowing that what happened 12 years ago was a result of her illness. Verity refuses to be coddled or treated like she’s fragile so it infuriates her that Monk is always asking about her wellbeing. This causes her to spiral once again, only this time, Monk calls her out. She’s insistent that she and her condition are too much for him and they will only end up like her parents. They leave one another on bad terms but in the end, their love refuses to let go.

Watching them both battle internally and out loud is a pain so raw you can feel it through the page. Their bodies are so in tune with one another, yet their hearts refuse to let go of the hurt and resentment holding them back.

I loved Verity and Monk peel back the layers and find love their way. These two were destined to love one another and I was so happy they found their way home. Once again Kennedy Ryan did her thing. Every time she broaches a sensitive subject, she does it with so much passion and care. It is truly something to behold. This one was definitely worth the wait.

TW: bipolar disorder, mental health, infidelity, grief

Rating: Monk & Verity were destined to love one another, and I’m so happy they found their way home.